Idiots trying to explain something they don't understand

Particularly when they think that they DO understand.

You have a query about something. You ask an idiot. Not deliberately. Let's say this idiot holds a position of authority. Maybe they work on a helpdesk. The idiot gives you the worst explanation you've ever heard in your life. It's garbled, ill-informed and contradictory. They look at you with pity and say something like: "I don't know how else to explain it. You're just not getting it, are you?"

Of course not. For one thing you've answered an entirely different question to the one I asked. One that you wanted or expected me to ask. You didn't bother listening to what I was actually saying. This was probably because you don't actually know what you're talking about and have just one set answer for any query directed your way. Please put your head in that drawer and repeatedly close it on your neck until the welt glows like a beacon.